Self Help for Anxiety- The Ultimate Guide

By Susanna Sweeney, MSc, MBACP, CHT

In this article, I have put together ten steps of self help for anxiety that you can use to change your life for the better.  You don't have to work through them in chronological order, use your own discretion for what stage you are at and what is right for you at this time.


self help for anxietySelf Help for Anxiety- 10 Steps for Changing Your Life

These steps don't offer any easy answers- because there are non when it comes to anxiety. Anxiety is a complex issue. Instead, these steps offer a comprehensive self care plan that I hope will bring you on the road with self help for anxiety.


1.    Before Attempting Self Help for Anxiety  Visit Your Doctor for a Thorough Consultation

My first recommendation is to talk to your doctor and rule out any possible physical causes for the anxiety you are experiencing. WebMD name the following health conditions that can cause anxiety:

  • Certain heart conditions such as an abnormal heart rhythm
  • Hyperthyroidism
  • Any health conditions that cause a lack of oxygen, such as emphysema
  • Brain injuries can be linked to anxiety
  • Check the leaflets of any medications you are currently taking. Some medications cause anxiety as a side effect.


If the anxiety you are experiencing has an underlying physical cause, it will require medical treatment. Discuss this with your doctor.

If the anxiety does not have a physical cause, this article is for you. In that case, very likely, your doctor will bring up the topic of medication. Medication is something you might consider if:

  • You need to get over a crisis period
  • You find the symptoms of anxiety too much to bear
  • You can’t function due to anxiety
  • You have tried self help for anxiety and nothing of the many things you have tried has worked


Take into account that every medical intervention has both potential benefits and potential risks. Be clear on what these are.

If you are considering taking medication, do your research on the particular medication your doctor is proposing. Very likely the leaflet for the medication can be found online and I suggest you read it carefully, taking note of any potential side effects.

Also, there are many online forums where you can find out how other people are doing on this medication. Only after this research decide what you want to do. It’s very important that this is your decision and you are making it on the basis of being fully informed.

If you do decide to take medication:

  • Make sure to monitor closely how you are doing on this medication. Is it beneficial? Are there any side effects?
  • The other suggestions in this article around self help for anxiety can still benefit you and further improve your situation.


Taking Medication Does Not Preclude You From Seeking Out Other Therapies

It's important to understand that taking medication does not preclude you from working on your anxiety using other therapies, too.

  • Here is a scientific study demonstrating a case study where anxiety hypnosis was used effectively in a case of severe anxiety while the subject was on psychiatric medication. The end result was that the medication was eventually discontinued. The study shows that psychiatric medication can work well in combination with hypnotherapy.
  • Find more information on attending counselling below. 


2. Supplementation- Powerful Self Help for Anxiety

Before seeking any specific anxiety treatment, you are well advised to rule out deficiencies in crucial minerals and vitamins that may be at the heart of feeling anxious, or that may be making matters much worse. Talk to your doctor about deficiency testing.

But even if you are not found to be clinically deficient according to blood tests- here are three supplements that can help to give your nervous system to operate at full capacity by making sure it is receiving the right nutrition.

Other sources will recommend a wide variety of supplements. I have boiled the list down to my top three. These, in my opinion, are the most commonsense supplements for anxiety that offer the best value for money.


self help for anxietySelf help for anxiety with supplementation

Here are the top three supplements that I recommend to support self help for anxiety:

Magnesium.

Magnesium is my number one g supplement for anxiety. Your body requires magnesium for a multitude of functions, including regulating sleep, activating many enzyme reactions, for proper muscle functioning and improving nerve conductivity.  Most people today are deficient in magnesium.
 
To get magnesium from your diet, you would need to include as many green vegetables as possible, such as spinach, different green salad leaves and broccoli. Most people don’t eat enough of these.

If you think you may be deficient in magnesium, choose a good magnesium supplement that is easily absorbed by the body, such as magnesium citrate. This will ensure you get the best results possible.

As well as supplementing with magnesium you should then avoid carbonated drinks and any foods that contain phosphates because these will bind magnesium and render it useless. Also avoid or at least reduce refined sugar, coffee and tea because these will leach magnesium from your body.


Vitamin D. 

Vitamin D is crucial for optimal functioning of the immune system and bones but also for proper brain development and functioning. Vitamin D deficiency can lead to depression and many diverse neurological problems including schizophrenia.

You can get enough vitamin D by exposing your naked body to sunlight for 20 minutes a day (without using sunscreen). If you live in a Northern climate, or sunshine just isn’t an option for you for whatever reason, make sure you supplement all year round.


Vitamin B complex. 

Many of the B vitamins are vital for proper functioning of the nervous system. Deficiencies can cause irritability, short term memory loss, depression, fatigue, difficulties concentrating, nervousness, and nerve damage.

Taking B vitamins can enhance your mood and improve your energy levels. They will also boost your immune system.


3. Get Support

Anxiety can be a very overwhelming experience. While you may choose to go through the next six steps on your own, practicing self-help for anxiety all the way, I just want to say that sometimes, support can make all the difference.

  • There may be a support group in your area.
  • You may have a friend who is also struggling with anxiety and is open to setting up support systems between the two of you.
  • You could join an online forum or group for support.
  • If your sense is that you may need a lot of individual support (if your symptoms are quite overwhelming) consider seeing a professional, such as a psychotherapist or counselor. They will give you individual attention usually for an hour per week and can help you implement the following six steps which can be difficult to work with all on your own.

One of the big benefits of support is that you will start to see that you are not on your own. when you suffer from anxiety, it's so easy to become lost in the intensity of the experience that it can feel like you are the only one in the world going through this. You are not!

Because of the intensity of the symptoms, another common belief by anxiety sufferers is that they feel they are going crazy. You are not. And, with a bit of work and by implementing a few simple tools you can learn to manage that anxiety so you can live a full life again. This is where professional support can really make a difference.

Is there a situation when you SHOULD definitely seek professional help?

Yes. If you are self harming or if you are in danger of doing so, or if you are feeling suicidal, I recommend you definitely seek professional help. You can still practice self help for anxiety alongside availing of professional help- so this guide will still come in useful.


4.    Develop a Healthy Lifestyle

Your lifestyle is completely within your control and hence is a good place to start practicing self help for anxiety.

There may be some factors in your life style that are promoting anxiety.

Here are some examples:

Recreational drugs.

If you are taking any recreational drugs realize that drugs may be making the anxiety worse- or may be causing you to experience anxiety in the first place. This may be a good time for you to stop taking these before you experience any other more severe effects.


Alcohol.

Drinking alcohol, too, won’t help matters. Alcohol can increase feelings of anxiety. I suggest you stop drinking alcohol, or at least cut your usage way down to below the recommended weekly allowance. Talk to your doctor and see what they recommend in your case.


Sleep.

Are you getting enough sleep? Not getting enough sleep may cause you to feel anxiety, or alternatively, may be making matters worse. Sleep is vital for your nervous system to recover so it can operate at its optimum.

If you are not getting 7-8 hours a night, but are surviving on less:

  • Consider supplementing with magnesium
  • Avoid screens starting from at least an hour before bedtime
  • Consider doing meditation or yoga before bedtime
  • Consider using sleep promoting essential oils such as Lavender and Frankincense before bed
  • Reduce stress in your life


Exercise.

Exercise has been shown to work as effectively as medication in reducing the symptoms of anxiety.  Exercise produces endorphins and makes you feel you have accomplished something.

If you want to keep it natural, consider including an exercise routine in your day.


Diet.

Junk food, soda drinks and caffeine won't nourish your body and brain, so my recommendation is to cut it out.

Overall, a balanced, healthy, clean diet that gives your body the nutrients it requires will support your recovery from anxiety.

You can find articles on particular anti-anxiety foods on my Pinterest page on the 'Anxiety Self Help' board.


self help for anxietyThe best self help for anxiety: fun and laughter!

Fun and laughter.

Laughing and having fun has been found to support healing from any health condition. Take it as a must when putting together your plan of self help for anxiety.

Make sure to balance the heavy experience of anxiety with some fun. Having fun doesn’t require anything complicated, and it can be had for free:

  • Watch plenty of comedy shows or comedy movies.
  • Laugh with friends.
  • Listen to music and dance around your apartment.
  • Take up an enjoyable hobby and spend time at it.


Stress.

I can hear you thinking: “Avoid stress? How will I do that?”

I do hear you.

This is a very stressful world we live in. But stress promotes anxiety when the stress hormone cortisol is released. And if stress becomes chronic, it can make anxiety worse.

Here are some things that could be causing you to feel stressed:

  • Are you working in a stressful job?
  • Are you in an unhappy situation at school or work that is causing you emotional stress?
  • Are you under pressure financially?
  • Are you experiencing stress in your relationship?
  • Are you stressed a as parent?
  • Have you recently experienced trauma, such as a car accident or the loss of someone close?


I suggest you take a close look at your life and evaluate what is causing you stress. Write all the items on a list.

Then think about each item:

  • Are there things in your life you can let go of? (E.g. commitments you don't need?)
  • Alternatively: Can you get support? Is there anybody you can talk to about this? (E.g. a supportive supervisor at work)
  • Realistically, are there other changes you can make? (E.g. delegate responsibilities to someone else)
  • If the stress won’t go away easily, keeping a journal can help to identify patterns and even to develop ideas not only about how to cope better, but also what you can change and how.
  • Stress reducing techniques can be very helpful in developing resilience to stress. See are there any courses in your area in mindfulness, stress reduction or resilience, or consider using self hypnosis relaxation techniques.

Reducing stress is crucial self help for anxiety.


5. A Form of Daily Practice as a Self Help Tool

Pick a daily practice to support your well being. Committing to using just one of the forms of daily practice on the list below on a daily basis will make a big difference in your life.

Forms of daily practice to choose from:

Keeping a Journal.

A crucial piece of self help for anxiety involves getting to know how anxiety works in your case:

  • Keeping a journal can help you pin down your triggers and patterns and what helps you calm down.
  • The simple act of writing things down can be helpful because it frees up mental energy.
  • Keeping a journal also helps develop an inner observer or witness- a part of you that can witness your experience almost as if from the outside. This observer technique can help you get to a place where the experience of anxiety no longer has the power to consume all of you.


Ask yourself these questions daily and write the answers in your journal:

  • What are the thought patterns that accompany anxiety? Write them down in one column, then evaluate them one by one and write the corresponding reality into the other column like in this example:

Anxiety Thought:

"Nobody likes me and I that's why I feel anxious at parties. The longer I stay, the more I think people don't like me."

Reality:

"I judge myself to be unlikable. In reality I have a good few friends who like me, namely x, y, and z. I don't know why, but I do feel anxious during social gatherings. But maybe that could change if I accepted and liked myself better."


Also write about:

  • What particular situations trigger you to feel anxious?
  • What are the kinds of things that happen just before you start feeling anxious?
  • What helps you to calm down when you feel anxious?


If you keep an anxiety journal on a daily basis and once a week go over what you have written all week- very soon, you will see a pattern emerge that gives you more information. You will learn about what triggers anxiety in your case, what helps, what changes to your lifestyle are necessary for your well being, and much more.


Yoga.

Yoga helps both your body and mind. Yoga can help you feel more contained. Yoga practice typically ends in meditation which can help calm your nervous system. Some yoga teachers even recommend special yoga poses for anxiety. I have articles with further resources on this on my Pinterest page for you, look out for the board 'Anxiety Self Help'.


Mindfulness.

Many mindfulness techniques would be helpful in relation to self help for anxiety. If you read on, I will talk you through a sample mindfulness technique lower down where you develop an inner observer who witnesses your triggers, feelings and actions. This can be very useful. You can gain a bird’s eye view of your life. This can help you better understand yourself as well as put anxiety in context.


self help for anxietyThe de-stressing effects of mindfulness and meditation are fantastic self help for anxiety.

Meditation.

There are many different forms of meditation and all of them will hold some benefit as self help for anxiety. I recommend Transcendental Meditation (TM). 

There is a lot of research around the benefits of Transcendental Meditation, which stretch from physical benefits such as an improved immune system to benefits for your mind and emotions such as improved concentration, much improved containment of emotions, and reduced stress and conflict in your life.

The commitment? TM requires you to meditate for 20 minutes twice a day. You can meditate anywhere, even on a bus or train. It fits easily into a busy life style. Investing in a TM training is one of the best things you can ever invest in. I use it myself daily, along with self hypnosis techniques.


self help for anxietySelf Help for Anxiety- 10 Steps for Changing Your Life

Spending Time in Nature.

Getting out into nature is excellent self help for anxiety. It is one of the most healing and resourcing things you can do to calm down anxiety.

Walking in the woods or barefoot on the sand at a beach and breathing fresh air produces endorphins. It’s good for your body, good for your emotions, good for your mental health. You can do it as often as you can, but if this is your daily practice, fit it into a regular slot once a day.

If you cannot get out of the city, go find a park. Walk barefoot in the grass. Lie on the grass.
Can you feel how the ground is supporting you?


Self Hypnosis.

Self hypnosis for anxiety can be very effective self help for anxiety that you can use right from the start.

Without spending much money, or even a dime, you can teach yourself self hypnosis relaxation techniques, and put together affirmations to be used as suggestions that can help you to alleviate anxiety (see examples on my Pinterest page on my board 'Affirmations').

You can use such a self help hypnosis program daily to teach your system to relax, to teach yourself to change the type of thinking that triggers anxiety for you, to foster positive emotions and to help you be more present in the moment.

You can design a special self hypnosis routine to be used during anxiety attacks which can help you to maneuver them safely.

Over time, you can look forward to a decrease in intensity of anxiety, and to an improvement in your quality of life. Check out this success story of someone who achieved just that using suggestion hypnosis alone.


6.  Healthy Boundaries are Self Help for Anxiety

One definite pattern emerging from my client work is that for many people anxiety is linked to feeling out of control. Are there areas in your life, such as certain relationships, where you feel out of control?

One such example is if you find it hard to draw boundaries.

  • Do you find it hard to say no?
  • Do you people-please in order to be liked by everyone?
  • Do you go along with things for the sake of peace, even though you are uncomfortable?
  • Do you settle for less for the sake of preserving a friendship/ relationship?
  • Do you tend to put yourself last?


Re-evaluate your boundaries and start saying ‘No’ more often. You might dread saying no, and it might be difficult to get started with it, but once you do, notice how liberating it can feel.

If you find this step difficult, having support maybe even from a professional may be really helpful here.


7.  Develop and Nurture Self Compassion

Many people who suffer from anxiety reach their turnaround point when they start developing self compassion. Practicing self compassion is great self help for anxiety.

How do you know that this is important in your case?

Think about the following points:

  • Do you expect too much from yourself?
  • Are you perfectionistic?
  • Are you hard on yourself?
  • Do you judge yourself?


For example, don’t judge yourself for experiencing anxiety. You are already having a hard enough time having to put up with the symptoms of anxiety.

Realize that there isn’t anything wrong with you for experiencing anxiety and there is nothing you are doing wrong that is causing this. Somewhere in your story there will be a reason for why you suffer from anxiety. (Have a look at my article Hypnosis Therapy for Anxiety where I use a real life example to illustrate how anxiety can arise.)

Go gentle on yourself with other issues, too.

For example, do you have a need for everything you do to be perfect? If it’s not entirely perfect, do you consider it a failure?

Develop kind thoughts and feelings towards yourself. Curb that all-too-common inner critic. Keeping a journal can be helpful here to help you notice and keep track of any such self-bashing habits you may have developed.

Catch yourself and correct the messages you are giving to yourself. Turn them around into positive statements. “I am just not good at ...x...” becomes “I would like to develop...x...”. “I did ...x... wrong.” Becomes “What I am learning here is that...”.

You will be surprised at the far reaching effects of developing self-compassion. Self compassion can help you to reduce the symptoms of anxiety by a great deal.


self help for anxietyAnxiety thoughts can seem overwhelming, but with a bit of distance you can start to see they are not reality.

8.  Develop an Internal Witness

When practicing the previous seven self care steps, you will have started keeping a journal, and you will have written about:

  • how you are feeling
  • what you are thinking
  • what you are doing
  • what the triggers to anxiety are
  • what helps you alleviate anxiety symptoms


Now you can start using this ground work to build present moment techniques. Why? When anxiety becomes intense, the only safe place to be is in the present moment.

But how do you get into the present moment?

Here is a simple yet powerful mindfulness technique to help you: Start developing an internal witness. Visualize this witness as a small part of you which sits on your shoulder and watches everything that is happening:

  • Things happening inside you, such as thoughts and emotions
  • Things happening outside you such as sounds, sights and smells around you

Developing such an internal witness takes a small bit of practice but is really worth the effort. It will help you to stop being completely consumed by the experience of anxiety. Instead, as well as experiencing it, you will be able to see it from a more removed point of view.

Once you have a degree of mastery with this practice, you can introduce another new concept for the witness to mindfully take notice of. This new concept are body sensations.


9.  Arrive in Your Body for Effective Self Help for Anxiety

The Default Response

When we experience distress, the default thing most people do is to cut off from their body. They get stuck in the head. What do I mean by that?

Think about these points:

  • When you experience anxiety, are your thoughts in overdrive?
  • Are you aware of your surroundings when you experience anxiety? Are your senses (smell, hearing, sight, touch perception etc.) switched on or off?
  • When you experience anxiety, can you feel your feet on the ground or where your buttocks touches the chair you are sitting on?

I bet you that your thoughts are running wild and that rather than feeling body sensations, you are likely mostly 'freaked out' by them.

And when you are freaked out and panicked, you are in your head. For a moment, let's look at what your mind will do when you feel anxious.

a) Your mind trying to make sense of what stimulus in the outside world caused the anxiety.

When thinking about why you feel anxious, your mind may well have INTERPRETED a small thing that happened, such as a throwaway remark someone made, as the cause of the anxiety symptoms.

The difficulty with that is that in reality, this remark was only a TRIGGER, not the root cause. In reality, the root cause of why you feel anxious is not visible to you right now because it's buried somewhere way back in your subconscious mind- the real cause of that anxiety is INTERNAL. (If you don't believe me, check out Jenny's story in my article "Hypnosis Therapy for Anxiety" which will illustrate this further.)

So, if the cause is internal, trying to make sense of it in relation to the outer world is not helpful.

b) Your mind trying to make sense of what YOU did to attract these unpleasant feelings of anxiety

And this is how things typically play out when people look for the internal cause of the anxiety they are feeling:

  • If only I hadn't said x I would not be feeling anxious.
  • If only I had been prepared...
  • If only I was more disciplined...
  • If only I was more like x...
  • ...and so on...

Making sense here will look for what you have done wrong to attract this unpleasant emotion. But this idea also is no good to you. Why? It typically will only lead you down one avenue- self blame. Being hard on yourself.

And being hard on yourself will, in turn, increase anxiety. If this is what happens to you, go back to step seven (self compassion).

So you can now see how the default process of making sense that your conscious mind goes to when you feel anxious is not helpful at all.


Learning to be in your body

So let's look at the alternative to the above- being in your body- the one place you have most likely been diligently avoiding during anxiety attacks.

Why would you want to be in your body? Because being in your body and being able to sense exactly what is going on WITHOUT interpreting the sensations in some fearful way is a powerful way of making you present in the present moment. And, as I already said above, being present in the here and now will help with managing panic and anxiety.

Once you can feel your body sensations without jumping to meaning (i.e. 'I have been a bad person', or 'I will die'), you will realize they are just body sensations, nothing more.

So, what are body sensations and how do you identify them?

To identify body sensations, ask yourself: How does my body tell me that I feel anxious right now? The answer to this question should contain only body sensations. Body sensations are the language of the physical body.

Here are some examples for sensations which may underlie anxiety:

  • Lump in throat
  • Tense chest
  • Palpitations
  • Hard to breathe
  • Shallow breath
  • Weight on chest
  • Tension all over
  • Tension in certain body parts
  • Butterflies in the stomach
  • churning or nausea in stomach
  • An energy rising from the stomach upwards
  • Pulling, drawing or clenching sensation
  • Impulse to run away
  • Sensation of lightness as if lifting slightly off the ground
  • A temperature change, such as hot or cold flushes


A funny thing will happen once you can identify and clearly focus on body sensation- anxiety won’t feel as overbearing.

You will start experiencing the sensations in the present moment. Your attention will be shifted from the fearful thoughts that drive anxiety to the present moment sensations in your body. In other words, you will sink down into your body, rather than spin off into fear.

You will discover that in the present moment things are usually bearable.

You may be experiencing uncomfortable body sensations, but you are alive and breathing, and you will see that in the here and now, there is no real danger. Stay with these body sensations. Observe them. Notice if they change, or stay the same. And that is all you have to do- just to witness the body sensations as they are unfolding internally.

Take my word for it: Those uncomfortable body sensations have a beginning, a peak and an end. All you have to do is sit out the anxiety attack. Now you have a method to pull yourself back from fearful thoughts. Get your internal observer or witness to remind you to check your body sensations.

Staying with anxiety on a sensation level can help you contain the experience much better and start feeling safer while experiencing anxiety. This is very practical self help for anxiety.

Another important element here is for you to enjoy being in your body. Think about what activities make you feel good physically- and spend time doing just that.


self help for anxietyDeveloping a positive vision is an essential piece of self help for anxiety.

10.    Develop a Positive Vision of the Future

This will probably be the most challenging of my steps of self help for anxiety.

This step is inviting you to separate yourself from making anxiety part of your identity. What do I mean by that? Really think about how you relate to your experience of anxiety, for example:

  • Do you call it MY anxiety?
  • Do you somewhere expect it to stay around for the long haul?
  • Are you submitting to the idea that you will have to take anxiety medications for the rest of your life?
Why is this important?

When something is part of your identity, you are inviting it to stay around for the long haul.  Is that what you want?

Hear this: You are more than anxiety. You are a beautiful human being with hopes, dreams, feelings and goals. You deserve to make them reality.

How would it be to develop a positive vision where you are fully in control of your life and feeling fulfilled?

Build meaning in your life. Find your purpose and start working towards a goal.

  • What are your secret dreams?
  • What do you want to achieve?
  • What is your ideal living situation?
  • What is your ideal job?

Dare to dream again. Dare to develop a positive vision. Actively visualize this at least once a day. Imagine it in as much detail as you can. How will achieving this vision make you feel? Feel the positive feelings. Going through this process is excellent self help for anxiety.

Having a sense of meaning and working towards a goal can put anxiety into context. It stops it from dominating your life.

And remember this: Whatever you can imagine, you can achieve.


Getting rid of anxiety symptoms through hypnotherapy

Your positive vision might well include shedding the symptoms of anxiety. Hypnotherapy can help here.

Once you are some way on the road with the steps in this guide and your symptoms stop being out of control, hypnosis for anxiety using regression hypnosis becomes an option. Regression hypnosis can help you to push the boat out a bit more and move towards becoming symptom free. This will involve the help of a professional hypnotherapist. See my recommendations here on how to get the best out of life regression hypnosis.

Here is to your speedy recovery.


More About Anxiety Hypnosis


Have you Heard About Havening for Anxiety? 

Havening Techniques® are a novel form of treatment that has only been around for a few years. We offer this service along with hypnosis in our online clinic and find the treatment to be highly effective for a variety of conditions including anxiety.

Find out about Havening here

Watch interviews with the founders of Havening


Where From Here?

If you are new to hypnosis and know little, you may also find the following articles helpful:

My article "What Is Hypnosis?" give s a simple explanation for what the state of hypnosis is and what it does.

"Does Hypnotherapy Work?" addresses those niggling doubts about hypnotherapy. Have you heard mixed things about hypnotherapy? This article is for you.

"How Does Hypnotherapy Work?" gives an overview over the main therapeutic techniques used in hypnotherapy so that you will know exactly what to expect.

"How Hypnosis Can Help You" gives a great introductory overview about the top ten issues hypnotherapy is used to help people with.

"16 Hypnosis Myths Exploded" is an essential read for anyone new to the field. You will be surprised how many myths you will discover that you had internalized.

Enjoy the read!


I hope you have found this article on self help for anxiety useful. Let me know how you are getting on in the comments below.

Regards,

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Hello Venturer,

Welcome to my Online Hypnotherapy Clinic. I am Susanna Sweeney, accredited psychotherapist and hypnotherapist. I have been helping people to overcome their blocks and move forward for 25+ years.  Along the way, I have fallen in love with hypnotherapy. 
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